How to develop patience?
Basically, I am not a very impatient woman. I have some basic patience or rather I would say that my patience level was pretty good until recently. But still, I would like to improve my patience.
When I say patience..i don’t mean just patience..i mean PATIENT ENOUGH TO HANDLE MY DAUGHTER and you should have understood by now, why I am writing this blog.
How can any kid be so adamant? And that too coming from my tummy? (hope my hubby does not read this)
Right from the moment she wakes up till the moment she sleeps in the night….everything is a war between us. Thank God, I am working (and am able to login to cmoms in office) For an instance, when I wake her up, she wakes up smiling, asking for a kiss from me and comes into my arms (wait…don’t come to any conclusions…!!!) “Smruthi…how do u brush ur teeeeeeethhh??”
“This is the way we brush our teeth…. brush our teeth…. brush our teeth….early innnnnn the moooorning….” (wow!wht a beautiful kid) Hope the day goes as smoothly with her!!!
But when I put the paste in her brush and start brushing …”amma balcony-ku polam”…..in the balcony “amma…black dog-a vara sollu…appo dhan brush pannuven…” After 5 mins (it is 8:00 already) , luckily the regular black dog goes past our gate.. “paaru…paaaru…seekiram vaaya thara…illati black dog strawberry paste edhthu poidum”, But as my fate would have it, the black dog runs past our gate and vanishes…. “Black dog-a ingaye iruuka sollu…..” Now pls tell me how do I explain this to the black dog because my daughter will not take any other explanation from me.;
By this time..my BP is already to boiling point. “kila poi paati kitta thekaren”
Get lost and I give the brush and paste to her. Downstairs, she still does not brush after 10 mins. It is 8:15 already and she has to get ready by 9:15 atleast. After I start shouting, she still does not start brushing. That’s all. Whack! En porumaiku avlo dhan di magale alavu.
Now suddenly the entire house hold : my husband, MIL, FIL and even my cook surround me and “En gayathri kolandhaiya pottu ippadi adikara!” (Welcome people, where were u guys all this time??) Even my little kid (9 months) laughs at me from a corner. As if I am a merciless woman and I don’t have any other job rather than beating my daughter….Believe me gals…it was just a slap and not the “ippadi adikara” type. It is only 8:30 in the morning. Adhukkulla ivlo poraatam. After that she doesn’t come near me. Brushes like a nice kid with her paati, takes her bath and comes to my room where I am getting ready for office and her sister is playing with some toys. She comes directly for the toys which her sister is playing with and grabs it from her. Started! I try to be patient.
“Koduma adha swathi kitta…ava un thangai dhana”….
“pls chellam…avala azha vidatha ma…..i willget u a new one”
“two vaangi tharuviya”
OK (Thank God!)
“appo kooda thara maaten”
I give swathi some other toy to play and start putting kudumi for smruthi. When I am almost finished with her, she pulls out the rubber band, clip and kalachifies her hair deliberately “po ma…valikudhu” My BP again starts rising as it 9:00 already. I shout at her, leave her alone and continue getting ready for office. Her father comes out of the bath room, sees smruthi’s hair and shouts at me “Innuma di ivalukku thala vaarala?” I stare at him and say “unga ponnu pottuka maatengara”
“smruthi…en ma kudumi pottukala?”
“amma pottu vidala pa”
“illa …ippo amma pottu viduva…potukiriya?”
So, in the presence of her father…she gets her hair combed like a very nice girl and go down to her paati to eat breakfast.
“Paathiya…ippadi nalla vidhama sonna…ava ketpa”
So, in a hurry burry…I get ready for office and start my bike waiting for smruthi to say bye to me. I will not say since im angry with her. So, she should only say…u..c…But en ponnu enna maadhiri dhana iruppa…..Her father notices us and tells smruthi to say tata to me (He dare not say this to me…tht too when im in tension already)
Amma…..bye…flying kiss…paathu po ma….
Thank God…morning episode over successfully….
So tell me ….how to improve my patience??? I tried praying when am getting angry, I tried counting 1-10 whenever I feel my BP rising…but nothing works…
The other day when I was about to mix complan in the night, she comes into the kitchen saying that she will only put complan and sugar in the tumbler for all three of us. I tried to tell her no…but as you can guess….she did not accept. I told her that I have just finished cleaning the kitchen and if she spills complan and sugar all over, I will have to clean again….but no…she would not have it….She had already lined up 3 tumblers and was pulling the complan bottle from my hands…
I start counting…
1 …….….2……….Paathu podu…..(puts 2 spoons of complan in the 1st tumbler)
3……4……spills the sugar…..
5……..puts complan in the 2nd tumbler……
6…..puts the sugar in her mouth…
7…slips and all the 3 tumblers with the complan are spilled on the floor….
let the 8 9 10 go to hell…………….
“Srrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee……inga vandhu unga ponna paarungaaaaaaaaaa…….And u tell me not to beat her…..”
“en da smruthu ippadi panna??”
***en da smruthu*** I stare at him like hell and he removes himself and smruthi from the scene without saying anything else….
After that there is the act of giving her the complan, making the bed for her and story telling and finally by the time she sleeps, I am totally drained and the last bit of patience in me has gone to America….no moon…no…the farthest star in the universe.
I never knew raising a kid would be so difficult. And to know that there is one more in the line after her.....ippove kanna kattudheee....