Monday, June 14, 2010

Holiday....Jolly day...

11 Jun 2010 was the ideal day for me, which I have often dreamed of. I bunked office to see my daughter going first day to her school. I know, it sounds silly but still, its ok.

So, on Friday, I woke up early, prepared breakfast and lunch, and woke up Smruthi, bathed her myself, made her ready for school myself, prepared her favorite Bread toast, fed her, packed lunch for my hubby and FIL, dropped her in school myself, spoke to her teachers and picked her from school myself. Then we spent some “our time” – just the two of us. We spoke about her likes and dislikes, her wants, her happenings in her school, laughed, played, and watched her favorite playschool annual day CD. She told me that she wanted a new ‘straw’ water bottle like the one V had in her school and not her old sipper bottle. She also needed a new snacks box.

2:00 – 4:30 – ‘My time’
Smruthi slept, and it was net time for me. Blogged, chatted and browsed. Then cleaned the house, and SLEPT. An afternoon nap after such a long, looooong time. Woke up at 4:30 – both of us.

5:00 – 6:30 – ‘Shopping time’

Went to some two three shops with Smruthi, before she could select her favorite Orange color water bottle and snacks box. Bought vegetables and groceries and returned home.

6:30 – 10:00 - 'Dinner time'

Prepared my hubby’s favorite aloo paratha with bindi masala side-dish. Received him with a smile, when he returned from office and served him dinner hot-hot. Since I don’t believe in being humble, I take pride in saying that both the dishes came out very nicely. I have understood that a dish becomes tastier, not only when it is made out of the right ingredients, but when it is made out of love. And to top it all, my hubby complimented me on the dish, and that too, without me asking him how it is. Vasishtar vaayala brahma-rishi. Then we chatted, played, told bed-time stories and finally, I went to sleep with a happy smile in my face.

One-day unplanned leave to office is worth this any day.
How I wish I could spend each and every day like this with my family. Sigh! *Deep breaths*

PS: If you are wondering why Swathi is nowhere in the picture, she had gone to see her atthai payan with her paati in my SIL’s place and she returned only after the weekend

Friday, June 11, 2010

MY School saga begins…..

Hey, I am starting my first school today. Not that I am new to this school environment, since my mom pushed me into a playschool when I was only 1 year and 10 months – the reason she gives for that is of course I could meet other kids of my age group. But I know her actual intention – she couldn’t bear with my naughtiness. Huh! But now, she is paying for it. I’ve trained my little sis to compensate for me. Ok, ok….coming back to the school part….

I got my school bag, uniforms and text books around some 10 days back and they are great. I was so excited to see my school things, but my excitement was nothing compared to my grand-dad’s. That man is absolutely crazy about me, I tell you. And he wanted to see me in my school dress then itself. And so, I obliged. I was waiting for my mom to arrive from office to show-off to her and she arrived 45 mins later than the usual time. Of course, she was so happy to see her little angel (ya, that’s me) in school uniform and bag. She said that I looked like a big girl. Mom – wake up….I AM a big girl now**. Just because you saw me first as a kid doesn’t mean I will be a kid all my life long – ok? Mothers!!!!

Ever since that day, she has been trying to wake me up early to train me for the school timings. Why can’t she just understand that I cannot sleep till 8’o clock once my school opens and so let me sleep now? She tried all possible tactics to wake me early all these days – by trying to threaten me saying that she will return all my uniform, bags and books to school and not let me go to school if I continue to wake up at 8. Huh! As if she will, or as if the school will accept them back. And so, I continued to sleep till 8.

I am a very good girl, and even as a kid, I liked going to the playschool. I never cried much even in my beginner days and so, my mom didn’t have to train me on that front for this school. Made one job easier for her. Poor female.

And today…I got up at 6. I knew that today was THE DAY and not just another one of my mother’s wake-up gimmick. So, got up promptly. And did all the right things at the right time. And I WORE MY NEW UNIFORM, SHOES AND SOCKS. And then it was time for mom to leave for her office. Actually, mom was getting all senti-senti again feeling that she couldn’t see me off even on my first day to school. She even thought of bunking office, putting sick-leave or something. And you know what? She has really bunked office today. Have you ever heard of anyone bunking office to see their kid go to school? My mom is totally crazy. But still, I love her for this. So, she started to continue making me ready, and my excitement continued…..

You know what? I am going to school. I AM REALLY GOING TO GO TO SCHOOL. I am going to enjoy it. I know that I will enjoy it. Due to all my excitement, and since I talk much, they have a feeling that I am going to be a gang-leader or something in my school, but tell me practically, have you ever heard of gang-leaders in pre-kg? And also, like any other parent, my parents expect me to be a class topper or something, not that it matters much to them, but still. Hope I have inherited my mother’s brains (u know who is typing this blog, right??) and let me see if I can live upto that.

So, I was all ready, prayed God and got into the car and picked up my friend S, (her dad and my dad are friends and we were in the same playschool and now in the same school), and hey…we have reached. Sorry, I have to go inside now. It is getting late for me. But I am sure that my mom will soon update you on my school experiences. That lady just cannot stop writing blogs. Can she?

Catch you all later.


(** She said “Amma, naan periyavala aayitten…chinna kolandhai illa”. She really said that.)

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Updates on the ‘Paasa Malargal’

It’s been a long time since I updated my kiddos’ activities. And here it is.

After the vacation in their paati’s place, the gals have developed a separate sort of affection towards me – u know the “I-missed-u, so-don’t-leave-me-again” types and I am feeling so good about it. But still, I would say that this vacation proved all the more that Smruthi is mother’s girl and Swathi is father’s girl.

After the 10 day break, when I went to my parent’s home (yes, what was ‘my home’ some years back, is ‘my parent’s home’ now ), fully expecting a hug from both my daughters, I was in for a big shock. Smruthi had gone out with her perimma, and Swathi was sitting on my mother’s lap, when I entered the house. On seeing me, she literally RAN AWAY FROM ME AND DID NOT COME TO ME. Well, my reaction? I leave it to your imagination. I thought that she had totally forgot her parents in these 10 days, but NO. When her father arrived after 15 minutes, she immediately ran from my mother into his arms, and did not get down from him for at least 1 hour, not even to allow him to go to the wash room. My reaction? Again, you can imagine it. The same happened when Smruthi came back, but this time it was totally the opposite. She came running to me with a big hug from the gate. Thank God! But after 1 hour, Swathi seemed to regain her memory about me and more than that, I feel that she came to me, mainly because she couldn’t stand seeing her sister on my lap for so long.

Ever since, both of them are totally attached to me and whenever I am at home, they are stuck to me. And Smruthi has gotten into the habit of saying “avala mattum thookariye…ennayum thookiko”, “avalukku mattum nee mammam ootariye…..enakkum ooti vidu” and this goes on for everything happening in the house. Call it insecurity or my mis-reading the facts, but Smruthi is feeling over-possessive about me and I think it is because of her vacation and not because of her sister. One day, she suddenly came into the kitchen, when I thought she was asleep, and I shouted at her for not having slept still. (I know, it was bad on my part, but it was the after-effects of a tiring office journey and the time was 10:15 PM.) And she replied very calmly, “Amma, I came to talk to you only. Please don’t shout at me. Let’s be friends. I will wait for you to finish work and we can go to sleep together”. This girl knows perfectly well how to make me feel guilty.

And Swathi. OH MY GOD! She is growing so fast. She has learnt to express herself. Whenever she wants something, she draws our attention to her and points the thing which she wants. She can inform us when she wets her pants – but yes, only after doing her job and not before it. She is bringing in a new definition to mischief. Whatever she holds in her hands, she wants to throw it out, and if by mistake, that thing does not fall out and is within the boundary, she takes the pains to push it out of the window. And then gives me a satisfied smile as if she has reached the moon. She is the lady on wheels in our house. If her sister is a talking machine, she is a walking machine. All the time she is awake, she wants to walk. Her aim in life I think is to live up to the line “Miles to go before I sleep….” Literally!

We once made the mistake of taking Swathi to a movie and I was only able to hear the dialogues and not see the screen, since she wanted to constantly walk in the theatre and would not remain seated even for a second. Luckily, we got the corner seats in the last row near to the door, so, I could let her walk and help others see the movie in peace. There was one moment, when I did the mistake of seeing the screen and she popped something from the floor into her mouth. When I asked her to spit it out, she shook her head and swallowed it immediately. Sigh! So, me and hubby switched roles after the interval, and during his shift, she slept. Now, that is what I call as karma!

Coming to the “paasa malar” relationship, so-far-so-good. They are very affectionate towards each other, as long as one does not want the thing which the other is having. Whenever Swathi gets hurt or something, she runs to her sister and shows the place where she got hurt and her dutiful sister in turn pacifies her. Smruthi is joining school this week and she has started teaching her sister now itself. Her coaching is so good, that when asked to tell 1..2…3…., Swathi shows her palms and points her fingers to indicate 1, 2 and 3 respectfully. Way to go girls….

As I have said previously, life is still becoming interesting day by day……

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Career woman vs Home Maker

Working women in today’s modern world seem to manage both their personal and professional life beautifully – or so I think. I am also a working mom, but I don’t think I am very much successful in managing both. In fact, I have a feeling that I am failing in both. I have always wanted to be a home-maker after my kids, but till date I am not one. So, I don’t concentrate much on my career hoping that I will definitely be a home maker some day.

Though my salary is not my family’s main source of income, with the education costs reaching sky-high these days, an additional income has become more than a necessity. And when there is a trust-worthy person like my MIL to take care of my kids, working should not be a problem - This is my hubby’s view point. And though I have not asked her, I know for sure that my MIL will never let me resign my job, even though my kids are giving her an extra tough time each day - and I know it is NOT for the money. In her view point, any woman, however good her family and husband is, needs to be financially independent at any cost. I agree with her and I love her for this. But still………

Some of the reasons which I feel valid for wanting to be a home-maker, is that I want to get involved in whatever my kids are doing – be it playing hide and seek, or fighting among themselves or eating, studying, watching and dancing, etc. I don’t want to give them a timeline to be with me. I want to give them ALL my time. The moment I enter my home after a tiring journey from office, both of them rush to me with their biggest smile, leaving behind whatever they are doing at that time. Though I feel blessed in this moment, I feel guilty to know that they miss me during the entire day. Of course, they have got used to it and Smruthi has become mature enough to understand that her mom is working for her sake, but I am still not able to shake-off my desire of becoming a home-maker some day. I want to be there when they wake up, I want to make Smruthi ready for school, prepare their breakfast and lunch, I want to say Tata, Bye-Bye when she leaves for school, to feed Swathi myself, to play with her, to receive Smruthi with a hug when she returns from school, to teach her home-work, to watch them fight, to keep the house clean, to receive my hubby home with a smile when he returns from office, to prepare his favorite dishes, serve them in his favorite crockery sets, to tell bed-time stories to my children, and many more. I feel bad whenever my daughters want to play with me during bed-time and I tell them to do it tomorrow since I am feeling very tired today….but unfortunately….that tomorrow never comes. And if there is one thing which I hate to the core about being a working mom is coming to work, when my kids are unwell. I simply hate not being there with them when they need me the most.

There have been many discussions and serious fights regarding this between me and him, but the results are always the same. He wins and I am still a working mom. If it had been the other way, I would have spent this time with my kids in home rather than wasting my time writing this blog sitting in office. If I had my own way, I would have long before resigned my job to be with my kids. But deep below in my heart, I know that his decision is correct (even though I don’t admit it in front of him) and I trust my hubby enough to allow him to take decisions for me. So, I continue my work without any complaints. But more often than not, I start feeling miserable again about being a working mom and the vedaaalam in me will yerify the murunga maram, I want to immediately quit my job and again starts all the drama between me and him. And my hubby is patient enough to bring down the vedaalam from the murunga maram and let me continue my job, and I like a good wife accept his view points and drop my idea of quitting my job. But still…..someday…. I want to be a home-maker. But when? Only God knows.

Reason for this blog
– For the past one week, the vedaalam in me is again trying to climb the tree and in order to prevent the fight which will again occur in due course, I am venting out my feelings with this blog and saving (trying to save) my hubby from the unwanted drama.